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THE STRAIGHT UP

Three shows. One weekend. Livers somewhat intact.

 
1-man waveWhat a weekend! First, the band let loose at the Spruce on Friday and drank more beer than a small army of Irish Wolfhounds.
 
Then onto Woofstock, where the band rocked n' rolled in some crap it found on the lawn. You ain’t seen nothing til you’ve experience hot Yorkie on Chocolate Lab action. Thanks again to the electric blues boys of Blue Mozart, who provided the LGC with stellar sound, and a special you-make-me-wanna-shout-out to Not Fade Away, who greased the crowd for us with their timely timeless rock n roll classics.
 
Later that night... The Rusty Trombones blew into Rubens in Peekskill for their maiden gig and despite the cramped quarters, everyone had a reach-around great time. Again, a round of thank yous to everybody who dragged themselves out for one last musical act in a weekend full of musical acts. Look for the next Rusty ‘Bones show at the Peekskill Coffee House, September 11th from 8 til 10 – not 24 hours after the almighty Scared Stiffs open up their hearts and veins once again for the hungry hordes at The Northwood, with Dino and the Hostages!

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Summertime and the living is sleazy

Sexy Sailor Girl PosterIs it possible to do too much floating in a pool with too many bikini bodies whilst drinking too much beer? God knows we’re trying to find out. As summer wraps us in its liquid lava grip, we douse ourselves with sun block and souse ourselves with fine imported lagers and misty domestics in equal amounts. Only when the sun has set do we drag our bedraggled bodies out of the primordial ooze that used to be our pool (before it became our home). Then, with the all the dexterity and grace of an emerging catfish crawling across asphalt, do we light the tiki torches -- signifying the end to another blazing hot day and the dawn of a new excuse to drink some more.
 
Speaking of... this weekend offers several Lifesize Gorgeous reasons to go on living:

First, on Friday, August 6th, the band returns to The Spruce Hill Inn for another electric sweat session. If you were there the first time we played, you know how good it was... but remember... legally you’re enjoined from talking about it.
 
Then on Sunday, the 8th, it’s a double-header of sorts as the LGC joins our good pals Blue Mozart to play a set for our fine furry friends (and no, we’re not talking about Dickie Mellonball and smarmy former manager Jeff Valley). We’re going to the dogs for the Woofstock Benefit at Sycamore Park in Mahopac. We commandeer the bandstand at 11:30 am with an assortment of bands to follow.

The Trombones at Ruben's Then, later on that same evening, it’s the musical event you didn’t know jackdiddley about but have totally been waiting for -- the maiden voyage gig of The Rusty Trombones, featuring Roxy, Otto and The Brown Tornado from The Lifesize Gorgeous Cocktails, and Beautiful Bobby Bauer from Hey Baby. It’s hard-ass acoustic rock and the perfect soundtrack for your fetish-filled life. It’s all happening at Ruben's Mexican Cafe in Peekskill from 6:00 til 8:30ish. So, if all you Rust Rioters aren’t quite done getting lubed up, may we suggest Ruben's as the perfect hub for a nightcap?
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Hair of the Dog with The LGC!

Two happy students of LGC High
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Calling all LGC Fans!

Get your Heart On for a great cause. Next Sunday the 15th, our best fiends, The Scared Stiffs (featuring the LGC’s own Otto Wino on guitar) are gathering up a great Post Valentine’s Show to benefit The Putnam Humane Society and The Putnam Valley Dog Shelter. 

There are lots of things those poor little kitties and puppies need, so check the poster to see how you can help. And if you wanna bring something to help feed the humans, that would be great, too.

The whole thing happens from 2-8 at the Putnam Valley German American Club. There’s going to be a ton of talented performers, some Roller Derby Girls and a whole lot of people giving of themselves to help out the animals! Come on down!

Valentine's Benefit Flyer
(click the poster for a larger image)

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Rudolph With Your Nose So Bright... You Really Need More Scotch Tonight?

Ever wonder about that? Why was Rudoph’s nose so bright? Was he really best choice for Santa’s designated driver?Reindeer (Guess Blitzen’s DUI’s finally caught up with him.)

Anyho, ho, ho....

Time to rev up all our reindeer drinking games again, hang mistletoe in all the most strategic positions (beltbuckles) and rock your stockings off in the holliest, jolliest way we know how... by dropping our Xmas Yule Log Rock Show on Sues’s Sunset House (December 19th @ 10 pm).

Featuring the return of Mai Tai Mike on guest guitar and as always, of course... the nicest, naughtiest group of gift-wrapped Go-Go dancers to ever melt a North Pole -- THE LUSCIOUS LUSHES!
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Full Moon Fever

She WAS wearing white....What is it about that big old silver rock in the sky that draws all the crazy critters out of the swamp? This past Friday night the She-Devil Brigade was out in full force vexing shocked onlookers with their hip-shakin’, back-breakin’ voodoothatyoudo dance moves.

Special thanks to the mysterious Lady in White, who repeatedly flashed the crowd before devouring some hapless (yet happy) mustachioed man on the dance floor, right before our bloodshot bewildered eyes.

(Editor’s Note – next time you bring out the Twin Milkmaids, make sure you face the band. We’re the ones working for it, for God's sake!)
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