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THE STRAIGHT UP

Drink Up, Throw Down, Throw Up

What a freakin weekend! Back-to-back gigs, hand-to-hand combat and lip-to-lip locking. Friday at Sue’s and Saturday at the Jim Mill. Thanks again to Sloe Jim Fizz and Nancy for being bold enough to let the Cocktails pour into their party and pound our sound down the throats of their unsuspecting friends and neighbors.

Meanwhile the LGC are busy planning their costumes and calendars around the return of The Scared Stiffs — rising from the grave for two nights of bone-chilling, flesh-eating Halloween fun. Whoever said “rock is dead” must have just come from a show creature-featuring these guys!



Oh yeah, may we once again recommend  the latest LGC libation below — THE BRAIN HEMORRHAGE. Never has a more disgusting cocktail been more appropriate for a holiday — seriously, this thing looks like a pavement oyster suspended in formaldehyde... ENJOY!

1 oz Peach Schnapps
1 tsp Bailey's Irish Cream
2 drops Grenadine

Pour the Peach Schnapps into a large shot glass. Slowly add the Bailey's and top with the grenadine.

Oh, by the way (shssssh), Mystery Gig in November....
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Atom Smashed

A Toast!

A Lifesize Gorgeous Toast  to the newly revved-up giant Swiss Proton Beam Particle Collider which will either:

  1. Finally reveal the deep dark mysterious origins of the genesis of our planet
  2. Open up matter-eating black holes which will ultimately destroy our planet.



At this point, either outcome is sort of okay with us. If it is truly the beginning of the end, then we leave you with these delectable shots of the gang at Otto’s Birthday Bash a couple of weeks ago, where atom-smashing and sour mashing coexisted in equal measure.




But if the only black hole in our future is Sarah Palin’s, then by god get your ass to the next Sunset House gig in Peekskill, Friday, September 19th. That’s back to FRIDAYS. Take note Calendar Girls!



And if we somehow manage to cling to our mortal coils beyond that, there’s The Scared Stiff’s own Chris Laubis’ annual Birthday Crusade happening (and we mean happening) at Seany B’s in Millbrook, NY on October 11th. Bands sharing the stage with The LGC are slinky voodude rockers Black Cat Xing and rode-hard-and-put-way-wet journeymen, Steel Rodeo.

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Time Flies
When You're Having Rum

May blends into June blends into July blends into… a devilish Caribe concoction of lost weekends and forgotten fortnights (that’s Brit for two-week black-outs).

Summer’s swinging and the blender’s getting more action than an Army Base Liquor Store Hooker. All of which leads us to the evil pleasures of Rum -- the cheap, murky mistress of mariners worldwide.Goodly Amounts of Rum Makes for Shrunken Heads

While some members of our favorite band, like “Bosun” Brown Tornado, strictly follow Captain Morgan off the plank, others like Otto prefer the landscape-erasing, tsunami effects of a fine Jamaican White Overproof. Stewed, of course enjoys his Mount Gay.

Whatever your pleasure, rum’s no fun unless it’s imbibed in true witch doctor fashion -- mixed with several other paralyzing poisons of the central nervous system, some fresh fruit, and served in what else? A handsomely horrific Tiki mug!

So da doo rum rum until you da don’t no more! And do stay tuned -- the Lifesize Gorgeous Cocktails are taking July to learn new songs to unleash on the unsuspecting masses August 23rd (Otto’s Birthday!) at the Sunset House in Peekskill.

Okole Maluna!
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April Showers bring Whiskey Sours

Whiskey SourThe Whiskey Sour is a famous mixed drink that originally featured an unholy cacophony of ingredients – bourbon whiskey, lemon juice, sugar and a yes, Rocky fans - dash of egg white. Initiate gag reflex sequence now. Interesting side note - it’s also famous for being Otto’s introduction to the Wonderful World of Wasted! Seems Otto’s old Uncle Salty thought it would be hilarious to see the wee tween slip around the sloop in a slick of his own vomit. Let the good times roll, Salty!

But hey, we all forgive and forget (except for Otto, who “accidentally” ran his Uncle Salty through with a rusty gaff in 1985) and we’re willing to now accept Whiskey Sours (sans embryo and Pixie Stix Mix) temporarily back into the LGC's officially sanctioned Cocktail Corner. Which brings us somewhat awkwardly to promoting the next Sunset House Show on April 18. We’re counting down the weeks, the days and the sours till the next time we have the honor to rock for you!
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Rainy Day Band (and a new poster!)

Here's a photo from the big (not-)after party subsequent to the rain-out at Crystal. (It features the earliest known photo of Harvé with the band.)

The Rainy Day Band
The rainy day band
Otto, Stewed, St. Pauli, Roxy, and Harvé
In their depression, The Lifesize Gorgeous Cocktails turn to drink.
(As if they needed the excuse...)

And on a happier note...
Here's the poster for the Sunset House show!
The LGC at Sunset House poster

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